On the matter of the bed...

This blog post was created months ago but not posted at the time.  It's been shared here in retrospect.

The bed and the bedroom become a big topic of conversation when you are expecting a baby.  First of course you and your companion will most likely talk about if the baby will sleep in the bedroom with you.  We quickly decided this was not something that would be happening in our bedroom, nor would the baby be sleeping in bed with us.  Of course we did agree that as the child got older early Saturday morning family time watching cartoons would be acceptable.  To be honest, I'm totally looking forward to doing sandwiches with Rob.  As an FYI it's where you and your significant other hug with the child or pet in between you.

In short order I realized the pregnancy side effect of needing to pee urgently.  After a brief discussion with Rob about the way our tiny bedroom was set up, he offered up his side of the bed so that I would have a straight shot to the bathroom in those urgent, still sleeping, bathroom calls.  Of course no one and no article prepared me for the dreams.  That's right, dreaming away and suddenly I am dreaming of peeing, I awake suddenly every time and have to rush to the bathroom.  While I am grateful for the warning dreams, I am terrified that there'll be one instance that I won't make it on time.  This is causing me to sleep lighter than normal. 

When Rob and I first decided to move in with each other I had forewarned him about my nasty little habit of being a bed and blanket hog.  I also warned him about my grumpiness upon waking or being woken up.  My own father has described my waking as that of a scene from the exorcist where my head spins, pea soup shoots from my mouth, and I scream curses and obscenities towards the offender who hath woken me from my slumber.  My mother would often threaten to come armed with a long broom to wake me as I would sleep through three alarms.

While over the years I had managed to get better at sharing the covers or the bed, pregnancy has made it worse than ever before.  Part of this is due to being uncomfortable and turning every which way I possibly can to try to ease the back pain I have been experiencing lately.  However, during all my tossing and turning I end up wrapping myself into a cocoon before Rob even has a chance to get into bed.  So of course he battles a half sleeping Crystal trying to regain some of the covers back, if I awaken he is met with spinning head and growling.  It is a terrible battle that this brave soul must endure in order to survive the long chilly night. 

Finally it happened, Rob had predicted it.  I have confiscated pretty much every pillow on the bed.  I have surrounded myself with every possible pillow I can and every night I manage to find a just comfortable enough sleeping position that I am able to drift happily into sleep.  This of course has left Rob with the two flattest pillows on the bed, feel sorry for him.

One night however as Rob looked into our tiny bedroom, he saw no hope.  I had sprawled out over the entire bed while wrapping myself in blankets.  The only available spots had been taken over by the animals.  He sighed and I had evidently growled though he fails to provide proof of this. He grabbed an extra blanket went to his chair and slept there for the night.  When I awoke in the morning, I was confused and slightly upset until I saw that I had confiscated all pillows, all blankets, and the entirety of the bed.  I'm hopeful that this won't happen often though we have started discussions on getting a more comfortable recliner.